Blue is the New Black (Crossover)
by Leo the Tiger
Summary: The Wild West catches up with the modern world as Dr. Eggman and Lawrence Limburger set attacks on Moo Mesa, while also protecting themselves from everybody who wears the color black.


Blue is the New Black (Crossover)

Cowtown was in a good mood, and it was easy to see why. Not only were Marshal Moo Montana and his posse becoming nationally renowned law cows of the West in places other than Moo Mesa, but both the Fab 5 and the Nickelbacks were also becoming just as common in Moo Mesa. This was due partially to the fact that an earthquake caused Moo Mesa to drop to the ground, although the communities emerged uninjured. No longer was it high above the clouds and a world apart from the all rest. Now it was accessible to the rest of the country. It was a popular tourist destination for humans and animals alike as well, as the nation had heard of Miss Lily's famous homemade sarsaparillas, and now, everybody had a chance to try them. Miss Lily told the press in an interview, "The earthquake really was a blessing in disguise, as it helped to bring in more customers than ever before. It helps to be family-friendly, as I do not under any circumstances serve alcohol. But the real miracle is that nothing was damaged or even scratched in the earthquake. The mesa had to come down at some point, I guess."

The earthquake also officially added Cowtown and the surrounding towns of Moo Mesa to the population of America, and the number of towns that preserved the traditions of the Wild West well into the 21st Century. Moo Mesa, however, had no modern technological updates like the rest of America, so it was having to adapt to those, although, like the Fab 5 and the Nickelbacks, some chose never to live with any of those, and those decisions received praise and applause from the public.

Because Cowtown was so used to seeing the Masked Bull as public enemy number one, they had absolutely no idea (although Moo, Dakota, and Cowlorado were aware of it) that Dr. Eggman had stumbled across the town. "Ah, what a beautiful ideal setting," he said to himself. "It's a shame I'm going to have to completely obliterate it! And on its ruins, I'll finally be able to start adding this puny planet to the Eggman Empire, provided I can talk that stink fish Lawrence Limburger into cooperating with me. Since he has been reduced to corporate get-rich-quick schemes, this should be a synch!" He laughed manically as he drove his mobile sky transportation device over to his hideout.

Eggman had no idea that Limburger still wanted to do his fellow stink fish proud by completing the task he was assigned to do in the first place. Limburger had no idea there was no way his fellow stink fish could get to him, however, because they were too busy trying to get back control of Mars and having no avail, not knowing about the terraforming Stoker's Regenerator was capable of.

When Eggman landed at his hideout, Limburger was waiting for him. "Have I told you about the Eggman Empire?" he asked, showing his short-term memory that partially creeped out on occasions like these.

"You have indeed," Limburger nodded. "Seeing as how it is no longer possible for me to destroy this planet thanks to those bothersome and annoying Biker Mice from Mars, all I can do is be rich from other people's misery. I am going to have to let you be the expert on this because it is your empire after all. But I will also tell you that it is only me you are cooperating with, since Napoleon Brie has been exiled to some other galaxy where he can do no harm. I didn't like Detroit anyway. Also, Grease Pit will not be showing any incompetence. Karbunkle is with me, aren't you, Karbunkle?"

"Yes, your cheddar cheesiness," Karbunkle replied. "Whatever you say goes on this. I do not believe any villains to be imported shall help you steal the natural resources."

"You shall sort of get what you want," said Eggman, "because I have plenty of substitutes for the earth's natural resources, at least for this part of the world for now."

"It won't be enough to do Plutark proud, but at the moment, they'll take anything. They haven't spoken to me for four years now. Wonder if they forgot about me? Oh, well. They won't when I bring them these resources. Where shall we start?"

"Right here," Eggman replied as he pointed towards Cowtown. "This is the place where that Masked Bull numbskull told me about those law cows. They don't know how to deal with me, so this will be a synch."

"Oh, indeed it shall, dear doctor," Limburger nodded. "But may I remind you that if you are to succeed, you will be the very first criminal to actually get away with it; this Moo Montana is on a winning streak he doesn't deserve."

"I would wager he won't have it anymore, your ice creaminess," Karbunkle spoke up.

"Oh, yes," said Limburger. "Dare I say it, even though it won't be me, very soon Eggman shall be the master of the world!" All three laughed manically before Eggman laid out his blueprint for the destruction of Cowtown. "Today, Cowtown. Tomorrow, the world!" Eggman laughed again.

Limburger turned towards his part of the deal: creating the substitutes for the natural resources. He smiled to himself and said, "Oh, what a joy it is to implement a plan without the slightest scent of Martian mouse or having to deal with one of the High Chairman's severely censorious overreactions. He expected too much out of me anyway."

Don't worry about it, people. Crimes of this magnitude never go unnoticed. As Moo and his posse arrived at his office for work, although his work really took place outside the office, the wind started to speed up. "Sure is windy today," Dakota commented. "Why's it changing directions so rapidly?"

"Beats me," said Cowlorado, "but I have a feeling something's happening and that we should investigate it."

The source of the wind decided to reveal himself at that point. "Ta-da!" he sang. "Hey!" he smiled. "How's it going, Moo?"

"Howdy, Sonic," Moo replied after chuckling to himself. "I thought the wind was you. What brings you to Cowtown?"

"I heard through the grapevine Eggman was lurking around somewhere in these parts," Sonic replied as his friends caught up with him. "You seen him?"

"I'm sorry." Moo shook his head. "If he's here, I didn't see him. I thought I smelled a foul odor, but that must've been someone else."

"That's our nemesis, old stink fish Lawrence Limburger himself," Throttle announced as he and his comrades arrived. "We're in hot pursuit of him and his trail led us here."

"Well, this is a switch," Cowlorado replied. "Your enemies here in Cowtown. Several times in your hometowns the Masked Bull struck and we came to your aid, but this time, your enemies are here and you are coming to our aid."

"Glad you could," said Moo. "Pinpoint the way to this Limburger and we'll follow you. Maybe Eggman is with him."

"All right, then follow us," Sonic smiled as he took off in the distance, although using of his other tricks to allow his friends to follow him.

Both the Fab 5 and the Nickelbacks recognized Sonic although he didn't recognize them, and by the time everyone had caught up with Sonic, out from the distance emerged the Righteous Outlaw as well. Neither Sonic nor his friends nor the Biker Mice had any idea of the Outlaw (although the Biker Mice had once cooperated with the Fab 5 and the Nickelbacks when Dead Hand Dan teamed up with Bully Dawggerson), but the Outlaw quickly filled them in.

"Oh, momma!" Modo reacted when heard about how the Outlaw had no name because Bully had burned his birth certificate to ashes after murdering his parents. "A cowboy without a name! It's like that old movie!"

"Hey, easy, big fella," Throttle replied. "It'll make a legend out of him. Besides, we got a score to settle."

"What do them varmints have up them sleeves of theirs?" Nathan asked when he saw how Eggman and Limburger were using machines to drill for oil, the first resource to be shipped to Plutark.

"I don't know," said the Outlaw, "but he's obviously stealing whatever that is!"

"So what are we waiting for?" Dakota spoke up. "Let's hog-tie those varmints!"

"We can't just charge in," Throttle objected. "Besides, I heard those villains were prepared for anybody wearing anything that's black. Black is the easiest target according to their defenses. I'm using the radar in my helmet to discover this, you understand."

"Oh, buzz-kill!" Vinnie snorted. "Part of my helmet is black! You're wearing black, bro, and the Outlaw over here is wearing black. Several people are wearing black. This is too unrighteous!"

"Limburger hates black because that's the color of the oil Grease Pit is dripping, but he's using black here," said Stoker. "That makes my Nightshift disguise out of play."

"I'm out," Shadow added. "My skin is black."

"Then leave it to me," Sonic snickered. "I know how to get past those bozo security systems." He snickered again and took off even faster than before. Modo and Vinnie had to grip onto their bikes for dear life.

The reason Eggman installed security systems designed to apprehend people wearing black as the easiest prey was because Limburger told him about how he had a bad streak against his enemies who wore black (in particular Stoker as Nightshift), and it left him sick to his stomach for two weeks the last time it happened.

Because the drilling was happening from an oil well close to one of the buildings Eggman put the systems in, Sonic gripped his hands on one security camera shooting a laser at him and used it to destroy the rest. This gave the others ample time to sneak in and surprise him. Sonic could not figure out why the buzzer kept sounding, however.

"What?" Eggman screamed. "How can this be?"

"Why can't he stop that buzzing?" Moo shouted.

"There must be backup systems for the backup systems," Throttle replied. "Old stink fish is a professional with those."

"We still have to stop them," Cowlorado objected. "Hold on! I'm going in!" He charged into the line of fire from one squadron of goons and promptly rounded them up. This prompted Nathan and his posse to do the same while Cody led the Fab 5 towards another squadron and returned their fire.

"What? No! Not my ever-so-costly drilling platform!" Limburger screamed.

"Hey, fatso!" Sonic called. "Come out and fight like a man!"

"We got you surrounded!" Tails added.

"Get out here or I'll use my fists!" Knuckles finished.

"And I'm armed as well," Modo added, getting in the spirit.

"Oh! Why can't they leave us alone just this once?" Limburger sighed. He ordered more goons to move in, but our heroes were well prepared. Vinnie used his flares to fight back before switching to his pistols. Throttle drew his own pistols and returned fire as well.

Sonic jumped into his trademark blue blur and made a big dent in the oil driller, causing it to shatter to pieces and spew oil all over the hideout, leaving Limburger and Eggman nowhere to run. Limburger managed to find a way out, but left no room for Eggman or Karbunkle to escape.

"Wait, your glorious glutinosity!" Karbunkle screamed as he tripped over the oil.

"Dreadfully sorry, Karbunkle," Limburger called, "but at the moment it's every man—or whatever you are—for himself."

Karbunkle winced as the hideout burst into a huge set of flames created by the act of Vinnie with his flares, Tom with his guns, Dakota with his brute strength (he threw a boulder at one of the heaters and caused an explosion), and Moo with his guns (of which the stars that came out bounced off the hideout's walls and dented another heater, leading to its explosion). Cowlorado and Nathan roped him out of the hideout as it burned to its doom.

Tails and the gang captured Eggman in the X-Tornado while the Biker Mice held Limburger at gunpoint. Limburger began crying to himself as he let Moo and his deputies escort him to the prison where he was to be held until the time came where he would be put back in Alcatraz, where he rightfully belonged but always seemed to escape. Tails went ahead and dropped Eggman in Alcatraz as well, where another cell had been reserved for him, so that made a total of six solitary confinement cells so far (as Alcatraz had been expanding on its borders), one of which was to hold Eggman. (Limburger, Karbunkle, Grease Pit, Ronaldo Rump, and Hairball occupied the other five, although Hairball had to share the cell with Pierre, his half-brother with a French accent.)

"What a rush!" Vinnie shouted after laughing triumphantly.

"We did it, bros!" Throttle replied. "This town's oil is rightfully this town's oil once again."

"Them entrepreneurs will be happy!" Cody spoke up.

"And the nation can relax as well," Nathan added.

"Score another one for the cowboy in black, and I didn't have to even bother with those security cameras," said the Outlaw.

"Couldn't have done it without you boys," Moo smiled, "and speed star Sonic over here."

"Hey, what are friends for?" Sonic replied, giving a thumbs-up. "Next time old Egg-meister shows his big, soggy belly up here, you just give us a call, okay?"

"Sure thing," said Moo. "You guys want some sarsaparillas? It's getting hot."

"I think we'll stick to root beer," Modo replied, "but we'll join you anyway." He turned to Stoker and asked, "How come you didn't turn into your superhero self?"

"I was still in my Nightshift outfit but without the mask," Stoker replied as the group headed for Miss Lily's Tumbleweed Saloon. "If it was just me in my normal clothing, it would have turned me into Super Stoker. This wasn't one of those jobs, however."

"I see," said Modo.

When the group reached Miss Lily's Tumbleweed Saloon, the crowds that gathered cheered for our heroes. Moo pointed out that Sonic was the mastermind behind the counterattack, and Sonic gleefully waved to the crowds. They walked inside the saloon, and Cowlorado took out his guitar and started performing the crowds, alongside several other musicians, so that the folks could participate in a hoedown. Although it wasn't their musical taste, the Biker Mice and Stoker enjoyed the music anyway, and Stoker spoke with the Outlaw about his Nightshift disguise when the Outlaw asked.. It was a great night to celebrate and for the folks of Cowtown to talk with Sonic, his friends, the Biker Mice, and Stoker.

THE END

* * *

_Wild West C.O.W.-Boys of Moo Mesa © Ryan Brown  
Sonic the Hedgehog © SEGA  
Biker Mice From Mars © Rick Ungar, Tom Tataranowicz, Tom Tataranowicz Animation, Brentwood Television Funnies, and everyone else who owns the rights  
The Fab 5, the Nickelbacks, the Righteous Outlaw, and Dead Hand Dan © me_


End file.
